Boy it is late. Or early.
We've been spending our holidays playing a lot of World of Warcraft, except when tickling the rodents (sounds like a euphemism), pointedly ignoring the literal 2' stack of grading and Other Crap until next week. Now and then we leave the cocoon for things like clearance sales and free gifts.
(Station casinos gave away wine this week. Mike doesn't drink, I almost never drink, and neither of us even cooks with wine. And yet we were foolishly pleased to make a special trip to collect it and often admire the dark bottles from across the room. Tunnel of Elms, Merlot, 2005 - retailing for an entire five dollars per bottle, on some websites.)
"Cheese narrative" (as my dad calls it) aside, we haven't been gorging much or even eating much. Mike has stomach trouble (which is what's keeping me up, but that's another story), and I have "I can't believe I'm leveling another blood elf to 20 just to have a chance to get a tiny pet reindeer for my main character, who is totally moderately rich and could just pay 30 gold in the auction house, but that isn't the same."
(Unfortunately, I know how WoW posts sound to non-players. I once was one. Sorry. Really.)
We did get some Mr Kipling's mince pies at Cost Plus World Market, where we occasionally go when we want to think about spending a lot of money on homesickness cures for Mike. This time, though, everything was half-off, so actual credit cards were swiped and everything.
One place we also went, and I can't remember why but I think it involved wanting something cheap for really cheap, was Wal-Mart. Usually we (say we) only go for hamster food, since they're the only ones in town carrying Hartz Original Recipe in bags, but now they seem to have stopped carrying HOR, so will we ever go again?
Well, actually, we went three times. The first time was just before Christmas. We went down the holiday aisle to see what might be on clearance in a few days. I say "holiday" not out of respect to the diversity in our culture, but because that's what it was - two holidays, actually. One side all red for Christmas, and one side all red for Valentine's Day. In fact, the banners overhead were all V-Day stuff.
No, I am not sh*tting you! December 24. 1 a.m. Parents with toddlers/infants/small ones all over the place. Crazy. And a full-on Valentine's Day display neck-and-neck with the Christmas stuff. The things I can imagine Erma Bombeck blogging about.
(Now that I think of it, doesn't every mommyblogger, really, owe a raised glass of iced-tea-and-bourbon to the big E?_
So, there was that trip to W-M. Then we went again a couple of days after Christmas, just to see if there was anything good left. That's when we noted, amid the dinge and the crud of the otherwise just-fine Henderson shopping center - that there was hardly anything good to start with. (And that one good thing? A set of pewter-style glass-like snowglobe ornaments? Gone, snatched up by the people who queue up at sunrise for W-M's return from their one day off.)
Then there was the trip last night, when we went out to get some stuff for Mike' stomach and decided that some walking would be good. Yes, you can walk on the Strip at midnight, but it's cold. And you have to park. Then walk through the smoky casinos. This is not recommended when one has tummy trouble. Wal-Mart it was, but I tell you, these booty calls cannot last. I think we're going to break up. Even in the nicest neighbourhoods here, W-M really is a depressing place. Gangs of fillers in hoodies smoking out front? Just icing. And now that we'll have to look elsewhere for a good hamster chow blend anyway...
But in happier consumer news, a post on Metafilter has pointed me to the super-neato Amazon Filler Item Finder.
If you're like me, you put off buying something because your Amazon shopping cart comes to $23.02 but free shipping starts at $25. So, I could pay, say, at least five dollars for shipping - OR - I could use the Filler Item Finder and pay just $1.98 for Cosmic Pet Catnip Puff Balls and it all ships for free. Or even spring an extra penny and get some festive cookie cutters.
You know those "End of the Internet" pages? I think we're really there. I don't think there's anything more I'm hoping to see. Who knew the Filler Item Finder would be it? Actually, last week I thought a certain other site would be it, but this passes even that.
(And that is the topic of some future post. You'll know it because it will be full of flaming caps saying DON'T CLICK THIS LINK, and then of course you will click that link, and a cold rift will descend between us where trust used to be. Let future generations see right here that I am telling you not to click that link. But since you will click, just know that these are the pretty days, the days between now and you and your itchy mouse finger and me and my yabbing gob.)
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